It's a Little Lonely Out Here (And I Wouldn't Trade It)

Pull up a chair. This one is a little more personal than our usual update.

People usually ask me about the sheep, the ice cream, or how we keep up with everything. What they don't often ask, and what I've been thinking about lately, is what it feels like to build something that nobody around you has built before. The honest answer is that being an entrepreneur and an innovator can be a little lonely. It's also one of the most rewarding things I've ever done.

Nobody Hands You a Playbook

When Terri and I started Mesta Meadows, we were raising fine wool sheep, French Merino and Cormo, and shipping wool to customers across North America and Northern Europe. Even that raised a few eyebrows around here. Then we decided to build a Grade A sheep dairy. Then we decided to turn that milk into French custard ice cream. As far as we know, Atelait is the Midwest's first farm-to-table sheep's milk ice cream.

Being “first” sounds exciting, and it is. But it also means there's nobody down the road you can call and ask, “Hey, how did you handle this?” There's no neighbor who's already made the mistakes for you. When the regulations get complicated, when a batch doesn't set up right, when you're trying to figure out how to get frozen product to a customer three states away without it thawing, you're figuring it out as you go.

And a lot of that figuring happens late at night. Anyone who has run a small business knows the feeling of lying awake doing math in your head, or getting up to check the freezers one more time. Those decisions land on your shoulders, and at the end of the day, you're the one who has to make the call.

The Questions Can Be Lonely Too

When you do something new, you spend a lot of time explaining yourself. Sheep's milk? Ice cream from sheep? Why would you do that? I've answered that question hundreds of times, at farmers markets, at trade shows, and at family dinners.

I don't mind. It's a fair question. But there's a particular kind of loneliness in believing in something before anybody else can see it. Every innovator I know has felt it. You see the finished picture in your head long before the fence is up, the building is built, or the first customer takes a bite. For a while, you're the only one who can see it.

But Here's the Thing: You're Never Really Alone

The longer I do this, the more I realize the loneliness is only part of the story.

I have Terri, who has believed in this crazy dream right alongside me. I have an amazing team at the ranch who show up for twice-a-day milking, feeding, fence repairs, and a hundred other chores, rain or shine. I have over 20 volunteers who help pull off the Ozark Highland Sheep, Fiber, and Craft Festival every spring. I have fellow farmers I'm proud to partner with. And I have the Lord, who has blessed this place more times than I can count, usually right when we needed it most.

I also get to teach entrepreneurship at Southeast Missouri State. Every semester, I look out at a room full of students who have their own ideas and their own “crazy dreams.” I tell them the truth: it's going to be hard, some days it's going to feel lonely, and it's going to be worth it. I think they believe me a little more because they know I'm living it.

Why It's So Rewarding

Here's what makes the late nights worth it.

It's watching someone take their first bite of Atelait and seeing their face change. It's the customer who tells us they haven't been able to enjoy ice cream in years, and now they can, because sheep's milk is so much easier on them. It's the families who visit the ranch, feed the animals, watch the fireflies, and tell us they felt right at home. It's the restaurant or retail partner who calls back to order more because their customers keep asking for it.

And it's something harder to put into words: the satisfaction of standing in the middle of something you built from nothing. Kind of like a long summer day of setting corner posts. At the end of it, you're worn out, but you can look back and see a nice, neat fence row that wasn't there that morning. Building a business is like that, just on a much longer timeline.

To Anyone Out There Building Something

If you're an entrepreneur, a farmer, a maker, or just somebody with an idea nobody else quite understands yet, I want you to hear this: the lonely feeling is normal. It doesn't mean you're on the wrong path. Sometimes it means you're on a path nobody has walked yet.

Find your people. Lean on your faith and your family. Celebrate the small wins, because there will be plenty of hard days in between. And keep going.

As for us, we'll keep milking sheep, making ice cream, and figuring things out one day at a time. Thanks for following along and for being part of our story. You're a bigger part of the “rewarding” side than you probably know.

I hope you're having a blessed month. Come see us at the ranch sometime!

— Ed